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One wise guy invented mobile application Whatsapp,
and
his wife added last seen feature

Eat…sleep….regret……repeat.

Dream as if you’ll live forever..
Live as if tomorrow is last one.

I had to take sick day.I’m sick of those peoples.

Always give your 100 percent ….
unless you’r donating blood .

God is really creative,
I mean..
just look at me.. 😋

I'm not lazy,
I'm on energy saving mode.

I love my job only when I'm on vacation.....

Life is Short,
Chat Fast..! 😀

You can never buy Love....
But still you have to pay for it 😜

Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software...
it's called #Monday, please fix it

C.L.A.S.S- come late and start sleeping 😴

I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.

If time does not wait for you,
don't worry.
Just remove the battery from the clock ⏰ and enjoy 🕺🏾 life.

I love my six pack so much,
I protect it with a layer of fat😜

Please GOD if you can't make me slim, make my friends fat.

If you can't find the key to success,
pick the lock.

Newton's law of love: Love can neither be created nor be destroyed.
Only it can transfer from one girlfriend to another with some loss of money.

Never laugh at your wife’s choices…
you are one of them.

If Money grew on trees,
then girls would be dating Monkeys.

When I was Born DEVIL said ohh shitt,
competition.

Behind every successful man,
there is a surprised woman.

Attitude is like a underwear Don’t show it just wore it.

I only need three things in life: Food , Wifi , Sleep.

Brain is Work More ..When You can use

I'm not lazy, I'm on energy saving mode.

Hey there Whatsapp is using me.

You can never buy Love... But still you have to pay for it !!

Girls use photoshop to look beautiful.. Boys use photoshop to show their creativity.

Dear Lord, there is a bug in your software... it's called Monday, please fix it.

Who needs television when there is so much drama on Facebook.

Save water - Drink beer!

My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death...

I live in a world of fantasy, so keep your reality away from me!

When I'm good, I'm very good and when I'm bad, I'm sensational!

I am crazy and hyper but that is 2 reasons why I am lovable.

Why is it so easy to fall asleep in class then in bed.

Nothing is lost until mom can't find it

Totally available! Please disturb me.

That awkward moment when the awkward moment get even more awkward!

Sleep till you’re hungry... Eat till you’re sleepy.

There are 3 types of people in the world- vegetarian, non-vegetarian and Tuesday / Saturday.

One day, I’m gonna make the onions cry.

Coins always make sound but the currency notes are always silent! that’s why I’m always calm and silent.

Second chances are for losers, either we do it in first place or live it for others.

Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.

We live in a society were pizza gets to your house before police.

One wise guy invented mobile application Whatsapp and his wife added last seen feature.

Jealousy = I actually care about you.

Life is too short. Don't waste it removing pen drive safely.

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